This column started out as a tips column with occasional product reviews and eventually became whatever I wrote down that month. Since I now lay out Sacra Blue, I see that Ken's Kompendium was out of control and without real focus. So starting with this issue, Ken's Kompendium will be closer to the original, a source of information.
Ken's Kompendium will define those computer terms and abbreviations. You will find those connector and cable pinouts and other stuff that you occasionally need but can not find. It will sometimes be funny but it will always be informative.
When I want to write about a product, it will appear elsewhere in the issue. The same goes for tips and techniques-they will show up somewhere else. Should I decide to step up on a soapbox and rant and rave about something, it will show up as an editorial.
Now that that's been said, I need to know what you want to see. The toughest thing for me is remembering not knowing something. I want you to send me a list of the terms and topics that you find confusing. I will dig through my resources and find the appropriate definitions and try to explain them in terms you will understand.
Next month, I will define all of the terms found on a couple of computer advertisements. This should enable you to make decisions about the next computer you purchase.
Send me e-mail with your lists of terms you do not understand. If I do not get a list, then I will pick a topic randomly. (I am not sure if that is a good thing.)
Message Abbreviations
A long time ago, in the early days of text communications, users started to use abbreviations to shorten the messages. These can be seen in chat groups, newsgroup messages and in normal e-mail messages. You may not have known what they meant. I found a bunch of them and put them here for your information. I cleaned up the list and so some of the more adult abbreviations do not appear. Just use your imagination to decipher those yourself.
<BG> Big grin.
<EOM> End of message.
<G> Grin.
<SOM> Start of message.
<VBG> Very big grin.
AFAIK As far as I know.
AFK Away from the keyboard.
ASAP As soon as possible.
BAK Back at keyboard.
BRB Be right back.
BTW By the way.
CU See you.
CYL8TR See you later.
DFI Don't know!
GTG Got to go.
IMHO In my humble opinion.
JIT Just in time.
JK Just kidding.
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LOL Laughing out loud.
NITLT Not in this lifetime.
OIC Oh! I See!
OTF On the floor.
OTFL On the floor laughing.
ROTFL Rolling on the floor laughing.
RTFM Read the manual.
SNAG Sensitive new age guy.
STAP Sooner than actually possible.
TFS Thanks for sharing.
TIA Thanks in advance.
TTFN Ta ta for now!
TTYL Talk to you later.
UFG Up for grabs.
YGTBK You've got to be kidding.
YMMV Your mileage may vary.
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Smileys
In addition to the abbreviations, something was needed to express emotion and the smiley was born. A smiley is viewed from the side. The basic smiley is made up of a colon for eyes, a dash for the nose, and a right parenthesis for a smile. It is usually used to indicate that you are joking since we can not hear the voice inflection in a text message.
Of course, once users understood the basic smiley, it began to mutate. Here are just some of the many smiley symbols you may see in your messages. There was an attempt to call smileys by a classier name, but somehow emoticons has not really caught on.
Even Microsoft recognizes smileys. If you attempt to type a normal smiley in Microsoft Word, it converts it to the character J. (More than a minor inconvenience when composing this article).
I do not advise you to start adding smileys to your business e-mail but you may find use for some of these in your personal correspondence. At least now you will be able to understand what someone else is trying to express when they send it in their messages.
Happy Feelings
:-) Happy
(-: Left-handed happiness
:-D Big smile
:-> Hey hey
;-) So happy, I could cry
;-) Wink
'-) Alternate wink
|-) Hee hee
|-D Ho ho
:-T Keeping a straight face
:-, Smirk
:-" Pursing lips
:-7 Just made wry statement
[] Hugs and_
:* Kisses
:-x Kiss
:-X A big wet kiss!
Sad Feelings
:-( Sad
:-[ Real downer
(:-( Frowning
:-c Very sad
:-C Very, very sad
:-< Very, very, very sad
;-( Crying
&-| Tearful
:-() I stubbed my toe
:-( ) You stepped on my toe
:-( ) You backed your car over my toe
Shock
:-o Uh oh!
:-* Oops!
:-& Tongue-tied
8-| Eyes wide with surprise
:-* Ate something bitter
:-6 Ate something sour
Neutral Feelings
:-\ Undecided
:-/ Lefty undecided
:-1 Bland face
:-! Alternate bland face
:-| Grim
Angry Feelings
:-V Shout
:-|| Anger
:O Yelling
:-@ Screaming
>-< Absolutely livid!!
Miscellaneous
:-[ Pouting
:-B Drooling
|-P Yuk
:-r Sticking tongue out
:*) Drunk
|-I Asleep
|-O Yawning/snoring
X-( Just died
Animals
:=| Baboon
:@) Pig
==:>) Rabbit
3:] Pet
3:[ Mean pet
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Appearances
-) Missing an eye
,-) Ditto, but he's winking
::-) Wears glasses
8-) Wears sunglasses
B:-) Wears sunglasses on head
B-) Wears horn-rimmed glasses
: g-) Wears pince-nez glasses
8:-) Little girl
:-)-8 Big girl
:-{) Wears mustache
:-{} Wears lipstick
{:-) Wears toupee
}:-( Wears toupee in an updraft
:-[ Vampire
:-E Bucktoothed vampire
:-F Bucktoothed vampire with one tooth missing
=:-) Punk rocker
=:-( Real punk rocker (real punk rockers don't smile)
=:-I Punk rocker with pierced lip
[:-) Wearing a Walkman
:-# Braces
:-$ Mouth wired shut
:^) Broken nose
|~( Alternate broken nose
`:-) Shaved one of his eyebrows off this morning
,:-) Same thing, other side
-)8 Wearing bow tie
{:-) Hair parted in the middle
}:-) Above, in an updraft
:-Q Smoker
:-? Smokes a pipe
:-7 Smokes a pipe
:-` Spitting out chewing tobacco
<:-I Wearing dunce hat
@:-) Wearing a turban
People
(C=:-) Chef
C=:-) Alternate chef
C:# Football player
8-) Swimmer
+-:-) Priest
:<) Ivy league school grad
@ :-> An Angel
@+;-) An Angel who knows everything
Celebrities
(8-o It's Mr Bill!
:-O Mr. Bill
*<:-) Santa Claus
*:o) And Bozo the Clown!
:*) Ed McMahon
C|:-= Charlie Chaplin
=|:-)= Abe Lincoln
:-[] Mick Jagger
Are These Smileys?
~~:-( Net flame
X-( Net suicide
@}-…- Rose
\_/7~~~ Cup of coffee
(::[]::) Band-Aid®
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[Ken Hopkins is an active member of the Sacramento PC User Group and currently serves as the Meeting Coordinator. You can reach him by email at ken.hopkins@sacpcug.org]
