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Hello again, chief! It's nice to be back-all that sun and surf can get to you, you know. Now that the leaves are turning and the tire fires are dying down, it's time to get back to work. No sooner did I come back then I heard you served notice to our prez about your plans to add emeritus to your title, which adds weight to the argument that the fairer sex is also the saner one. I also noticed that you won't be stepping down until next May, so that should leave enough time for you to find your replacement at the last minute.
Speaking of editor emeriti, it seems your predecessor is following in the footsteps of a certain president (and editor) emeritus who's held nearly every position our group has to offer. Your predecessor isn't creating campaign flyers for president yet, but I did notice that he snapped up the group's open PR position as soon as the president emeritus vacated it. Sounds like a bad case of hero worship to me. [Or insanity. -Ed.]
Feast or Famine
Your predecessor has had an interesting year. You probably heard that he was sick since late March with some kind of ear disorder, experiencing all sorts of fun symptoms like dizziness, ringing of the ears, earaches, headaches and sleeplessness. A battery of tests finally found something wrong, but the doctors couldn't figure out a cause. Many prescriptions failed to alleviate the symptoms. Just before he got desperate enough to try faith healers (or homeopaths, who are basically the same thing), an over-the-counter drug turned out to do the trick. Hurray! Time to go back to work! Except he had been laid off while he had been on disability. Oops!
Don't worry, our distinguished former editor is not at immediate risk of starvation. Severance pay, book-editing fees and unemployment pay have sufficed to keep the wolf from his door (to the great relief of his cats, no doubt). He's recently landed a real job, in addition to his freelance tech writing, so things are looking up. As for his mystified doctors, I think they suspect his cure is due to one particular change in his life, and you, chief, can guess what it was. [Retirement from Sacra Blue! -Ed.]
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Triumphant Returns
Speaking of our president emeritus, sightings of him at user group functions have been scarce lately. Rumor has it that he's actually been working-you know, writing and grading exams and quizzes for his beleaguered math students-instead of attending meetings. But before you light your torches and go around looking for him, he has been seen at recent Davis chapter meetings.
And speaking of a triumphant return, it was a pleasure to see our Webmaster emeritus and Davis chapter prez Dave Eden back at the chapter meeting last month. Your predecessor wasn't the only one with medical problems. Dave woke up one day with limited movement in his right arm, but Dave's doctors found the problem-in his neck. A couple of months ago, Dave had to have surgery to fuse some neck bones, and now that he's fully recovered, he's returned to lead our Davis chapter once again. The chapter was undaunted by Dave's absence, as chapter veep Tim Feldman filled in during Dave's absence. Since Dave filled in last year when then-prez Tim Feldman was absent, Dave's return marks the restoration of balance in our Davis chapter, too.
I'm sorry to see you go, chief, but I think you'll agree that my report on all this good news more than justifies my vacation bill that I sent with my report. Your predecessor did tell you about my requirements for this job, didn't he? [Oh, yes, DB, he told me everything. -Ed.]
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